I am an adjunct whore.

From semester-to-semester, I do tricks, my adjunct legs spread wide, willing to settle for a pittance for my services.

I am cheap. I am expendable. I am powerless.

Should I make waves, I will be dismissed, for the next adjunct whore is standing in line, waiting for my crumbs. I will do whatever academic tricks my administration wants me to do, no matter how repugnant.

I am also a forever-adjunct. My university/college/tech school has decided, “Why buy the full package when classes can be serviced for practically nothing?”

I do not expect sympathy—I have made my own academic bed, my adjunct whoredom sealed. You see, I actually believed my chair when years ago he/she “hinted” that I would likely be promoted to a real job. Good intentions, change of administration, a too-familiar story.

Remember this, adjunct whores:

You are in this alone.

Your full-time colleagues and fellow adjunct whores, who are too busy sucking up, will not help you. We are all too busy looking after Number One.

Love academe, but trust no one, especially administrators.

Until I retire, I shall remain an adjunct whore.


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Calling All Adjunct Whores: Your Horror Story

Details here

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Calling All Adjunct Whores: Your "Fuzzy" and "Warm" Story

Details here

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Wednesday, June 2, 2010

BIG NEWS: Rate Your Students is No More

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UPDATE


Rumors of their death may have been premature. A note on the site:
As you can see, there is a problem. Somebody is working on it.


Was there a smackdown by Blogger???

I went to catch a few laughs at RYS and found this:



and an empty blog.

It could be one of their numerous stunts, but I wonder. It was getting a bit crazy at the compound, like someone going dipshit ape crazy.

Well, scratch one more site off my stalking list.

R.I.P.

R.Y.S.


* * *

From the News: An Adjunct Whore Who Has Made It...

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At Boston College, Bonnie Jefferson, a former Adjunct, wins a prestigious award as a full timer:

Full story


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From the News: SUSLA to offer two associate degrees online

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Way to go, Southern University-Shreveport of Louisiana (SUSLA), a GREAT start, with those two Adjunct (Whores).

Full Story


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From the News: 3 from Bard among Guggenheim fellows

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Don't you like how institutions trot out their Adjunct Whores when it's to their benefit?

The Full Story


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From the News: Highly-Paid Whores...

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Adjunct professors and staff members at Columbus State Community College will be getting an overall 3.6 percent salary hike.

Full story

For a new wage of $46.30 per hour, in fact.

But let's look at the overall figures.

It's likely that per hourly wage is for "face time" only and does not include syllabus planning, class preparation, grading tests and papers, mandatory office hours and meetings, etc., so let's parse this out:
1 course = 3 hours per week.

3 hours x $46.30 = $138.90
Let's say that, on average, The Whore teaches three classes, so $138.90 x 3 classes = $416.70 per week.

Now there are 15 weeks in a semester, but if you subtract two weeks for vacations and holidays (because it's highly unlikely that Adjunct Whores get paid vacations), that leaves 13 weeks of pay: 13 weeks x $416.70 = A whopping $5,417.10 per semester.

$5,417.10 x 2 =

* * * $10,832.20 per year* * *


Let's be conservative and say that The Whore spends 31 hours a week prepping, keeping mandatory "office hours," grading, etc. + 9 hours of face time. This equals 40 hours of work:

26 weeks x 40 hours per week = 1,040 hours per year

$10,832.20 divided by 1,040 = $10.42 an hour
Slightly over minimum wage.

The reality is, Adjunct Whores probably put in more time than that, more like 50 hours: 26 weeks x 50 hours per week = 1,300 hours per year:
$10,832.20 annual salary divided by 1,300 hours per year = $8.33 per hour, barely minimum wage
Most adjunct whores hold at least a Master's degree, so this demonstrates very clearly how much community colleges value their contingent workers.

Here's a question for you: When was the last time you lived on slightly under $11,000 per year for your 18 years of education?

Raise your hand, or COMMENT below.

One other thing, if an Adjunct Whore spreads her Academic legs for more than one college, university, or community college, her pay per hour nearly doubles or triples accordingly.

Why?

Because those 40-50 hours are now divided among two or three institutions. For example, it is nearly physically impossible to work 150 hours a week if one freeway flies to three different institutions.

Let's say The Whore is teaching at three institutions (which is not all that unusual). Add to that 50 hours for the first institution another 18 hours of face time + 2 office hours = (for which a freeway flyer cannot skimp), for a grand total of 70 hours per week. Let's assume that The Whore is pulling down a yearly salary of $40,000.

Sounds like a lot of money, doesn't it?

Let's look at the figures:
70 hours per week x 26 weeks per year = 1,820 hours per year.

$40,000 divided by 1,820 = $22.00 per hour
Not bad, huh?

But consider this:

It is likely that the Adjunct Whore is paying her own health insurance and paying into her own pension plan (however, it is unlikely she can afford to do this). In addition, travel costs are involved (gas, depreciation, car repairs), especially if her institutions are far apart.

The Adjunct Whore has only so much energy, so she begins cutting corners, which results in negative student evaluations, for example,
"My professor was never available."

"We met in the parking lot, sitting in the professor's car."

"My professor seemed distracted and ill-prepared."

"My professor was always rumpled and in a hurry."
And so it goes.

In the end, there are three losers:
The Adjunct Whore

The institution

The students.
The institution may crunch the numbers and see a perfect way of cutting costs, but, in the end, they are offering their students (their paying customers) a shoddy product.

We are ALL losers, I'm afraid.

* * *

Today's Wisdom

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You can take the adjunct out of the girl or boy, but you can't escape the stink of the whore.

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Monday, May 17, 2010

No Pictures, No Frills Blog

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Some bloggers write for fame and/or profit.

I don't give a shit about those things. I just want to rant and spew.

I'm writing this, a writer-based form of literary masturbation, just for my own entertainment.

Get over it.

So what if I'm pissing in the wind, just as long as I'm pissing away from my direction?

What you see is all you will get. No artwork, no photos, and no YouTube, unless it's an integral part of the content. From a blogger's perspective, those bells and whistles are too distracting and take away from the real intent of this blog.

You may comment, but at your peril, especially if my BS meter goes off.

I'm liable to rip you a wide one, for this is my kingdom, and here I rule. If you are an asshole administrator, especially from my school, I'll be especially rough on you.

Oh, wait, I'm going to be rough on you, no matter what.

Have a nice day!

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Saturday, May 15, 2010

My Adjunct Whore Story

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First thing you ought to know: overall, my life has not been awful.

I have a great family and have had some impressive professional accomplishments, which, for obvious reasons, I cannot reveal. Suffice to say that I have published some scholarly articles and given awards in my field.

Being an adjunct whore has not diminished those areas of my life, but it has hit my pocketbook and held me back in academe.

Also, I take at least partial responsibility for my current status; I should have taken my career in another direction before it was too late. I could spend the rest of my life lamenting my unfortunate decision, but it is what it is.

See if this sounds at least vaguely familiar.

Ten or fifteen years ago, I was attending a major conference, and I ran into a former colleague, a former adjunct whore who was now unemployed and looking for another adjunct gig. Due to her husband's job, she had moved halfway across the country and was having difficulties finding a job.

At the time, I felt that my college/university was a good employer; adjuncts were given a lot of freedom, in terms of pedagogy, preference in selecting course times and days, and choices in text selection. More importantly, we received support and help if we had difficult students. Back then, colleges and universities were not so "consumer oriented" when it came to retaining students because just about every respectable college and university was on board when it came to maintaining high standards for top grades. Also, it was assumed that college students would be living in modest dorm rooms and eating mystery meat in the cafeteria--none of this blatant posh pandering to spoiled children.

In addition, my student evaluations were decent; the chair did not worry about the occasional disgruntled student. More than that, this chair listened to adjunct suggestions and concerns. Sure, it sucked that we received no benefits or decent pay raises, but there was something to be said for a pleasant workplace with friendly colleagues and a sympathetic chair.

"I wish I would have never left______________," my former colleague said over coffee.

"Yeah, it's a great place to work," I said, beaming. "I'm so fortunate."

Then we got into a discussion about complaining adjuncts and how they "drag" down the department with their negativism. We talked about two individuals in particular, two older women, one long-time adjunct and one fairly new hire. Both had complained of unruly students who misbehaved in class and treated them with disrespect. According to these adjuncts, nothing was being done about their plight.

"M. and S. make their own troubles," I said. "If you do your job in the right way, you have nothing to worry about."

My colleague nodded. We even agreed that tenure was an outdated practice that ought to be banned.

I wasn't about to go to bat for people who couldn't get on board and take control of their classrooms.

They were truly in this alone because the rest of us were not about to "risk" our adjunct capital on two whiners.

Soon, one of the women was fired outright, and the other stayed on, but barely hung on, only to get the ax a few years later while growing too old for the chair's taste.

Two years after that meeting with my former colleague, the climate department changed. My chair stepped down, and the school hired a new one from the outside.

The new chair took an instant dislike to me and a few other older adjuncts, particularly those who dared to ask questions at the mandatory adjunct meetings. Our past chair had welcomed our questions and actually listened to what we had to say. Even if our ideas were not always implemented, we always felt that we had been heard.

The new chair's implicit message soon became clear: "I'll ask for your opinion, but it had better be the right opinion." In short, meetings were held to see who was and wasn't on board with his/her policies, not to elicit true discussion.

It also became clear that he/she preferred adjuncts fresh out of graduate school, young hotties of both sexes, who spent the next several years, coming and going, often giving notice a day before classes were to begin. A small core of "regulars" remained, but we became fragmented and suspicious of each other, long-term friendships cooling and even ending.

We were in this alone, the old camaraderie up in smoke.

Eventually, adjunct meetings became a clusterfuck of nodding yes-women and yes-men, a continuum of the great zipped lip. Staying firmly below the radar became the norm.

At one point, one feisty and ill-advised adjunct even tried to organize an adjunct union, but, by then, the young revolving-door hotties were in the majority and were more interested in getting letters of recommendations for their real upcoming jobs. This rabble-rouser was nearly laughed out of town and, eventually, was out of a job.

So now I'm now the "older" adjunct who must worry about student evaluations and maintaining class decorum without being viewed as the old crotchety adjunct whore who is just plain mean and not fit to teach the "delicate" flowers who populate our classrooms. God help us should we hurt a misbehaving brat's feelings by asking him or her to turn off the GD cell phone or ordering a disruptive asshole out of the classroom. God help us if we punish a plagiarizing cretin by flunking his or her cheating ass.

No doubt, I will soon be called in and given the ax; some bogus reason will be given, but I know for a fact that my age and no-nonsense manner will be the main factors. Yes, it's illegal to discriminate against someone because of age, but adjuncts belong to a special class of workers who are offered contingent contracts as "independent contractors," a contract that binds us to the college/university for the semester but gives them all kinds of loopholes for getting rid of us.

This is why I am in this alone.

We're all in this alone.
* * *

Interesting "Fuzzy" and "Warm" Adjunct Whore Stories: Post Here!

* * *

Have any interesting "fuzzy" and "warm" Adjunct Whore stories?

If so, post them here in the comment section.

Or email here

Adjunct Whore reserves the right to move a comment to an actual post and add commentary to it.

If your emailed story is selected, it will appear on this blog as a post, and, if you wish, you and your school will remain anonymous. In that case, before submitting, please make sure that identifying details have been removed, even if you must "fudge" a little.

By posting here or submitting your fuzziness and warmth via email, you grant Adjunct Whore the right to post your work in perpetuity, along with Adjunct Whore's commentary.

Adjunct Whore does not answer her email.

Any questions will be answered via this blog.

* * *

Interesting Adjunct Whore Horror Stories: Post Here!

* * *

Have any interesting Adjunct Whore horror stories?

If so, post them here in the comment section.

Or email here

Adjunct Whore reserves the right to move a comment to an actual post and add commentary to it.

If your emailed story is selected, it will appear on this blog as a post, and you and your school will remain anonymous. Before submitting, please make sure that identifying details have been removed, even if you must "fudge" a little.

By posting here or submitting your horror via email, you grant Adjunct Whore the right to post your work in perpetuity, along with Adjunct Whore's commentary.

Adjunct Whore does not answer her email.

Any questions will be answered via this blog.

* * *

Union Blips: Maine's Community Colleges

* * *

AUGUSTA -- Part-time adjunct professors at Maine's community colleges opted to unionize Monday, voting 264-96 in favor of affiliating with the Maine State Employees Association.

Complete story


This begs the question: Who were the 96 nays???

Take away quote from article:

Maine Community College System officials released a statement that said it "respects" the vote's outcome and the Maine Labor Relation Board's determination that adjunct faculty members are eligible to form a union.

Hmmmm..., but if you become too annoying, we'll find a way to fire your ass.

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You are in this alone

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Every post on this blog contains this label.

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Definition of an Adjunct Whore

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An adjunct whore (aka AW)...

1. Is female or male,
but it is no accident that most AW’s are women.

2. Holds no power whatsoever, especially in the classroom.
Once the little nippers figure out an AW’s place in the food chain, the AW is toast and will be eaten alive and forced to sink even lower in the AW abyss. Sooner or later, an AW will lose her/his job because of a student complaint, unless AW “entertains” (instead of educating) and awards unearned A's.

It is called “survival of the nimblest,” favoring the ones forced to sell out their educational ethics.

3. Usually receives low pay,
Although some AW’s are more high-priced than others.

4. Depends on her/his meager paycheck to survive,
Even if it’s a supplemental income to her/his spouse’s.

5. Has no voice in university governance,
Even if the AW belongs to the governing body and has a ½ or ¾ vote, a public vote that is often taken by a raise of hands .

University governance is set up to protect the perks of the elite, not the human rights of the disenfranchised.

6. Can be fired for any reason and at any time,
Even in the middle of a semester.

AW’s are a dime a dozen and, thus, expendable.

7. Has no support from tenured or tenured track faculty,
Who are too invested in their own raises and fringe benefits.

8. Has no support from other AW’s,
Who are too invested in hanging onto their meager means of survival to care about anyone else’s troubles.

Remember:
You are in this alone.

9. Has no other employment,
And has little or no prospects for a full-time gig elsewhere.

10. Is over-educated and under-employed.
Colleges and universities that employ armies of adjunct whores are RESPONSIBLE for the dumbing down of American higher education.

In case you didn’t get that, let me repeat: Colleges and universities that employ armies of adjunct whores are RESPONSIBLE for the dumbing down of American higher education.

How can our higher educational system enforce high standards when oppressed AW’s are the supposed gatekeepers of the classroom? When the real rulers of the roost are students themselves and their parents’ tuition $$,$$$?

IRONY: The moguls of higher education have decided to skimp on the production of the product they are trying to sell.

How is that working out for higher education?

Hint: Think Toyota, think BP. Think Enron.

* * *

Monday, May 3, 2010

Byrnn from Rate Your Sudents Does "The Right Thing"

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Bryn from Rate Your Students regarding awarding A's and B's to students who haven't earned high grades:
...I try to hold myself to the principle that it is better in the long run to do what is right, rather than what is easy or expedient. I have never put much stock into course evaluations anyway.
Hmmmmm...I'm pretty sure that Brynn is not an Adjunct Whore.

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Friday, April 16, 2010

Today is the First Day of the Rest of My Adjunct Whore Life

* * *

Hello.

My first post.

I don't have a lot to say, really. In my intro, I have said just about all there is to say about being an adjunct whore.

It's an all too familiar story.

I settled for scraps. I made a choice when, years ago, I signed that first adjunct contract. I didn't realize what I know now: my institution would never hire me full-time. I was naive and idealistic.

My bad.

Institutions of higher learning that hire adjunct whores are pimps. Sometimes the pimps are benevolent, most often not. In every case, the pimp holds all the Aces.

Even benevolent pimps can turn on you--fair-haired boy or girl one day, and with one change in chair or director, trash the next.

Truths:
--Adjunct Whores do not enjoy academic freedom. Not one iota. I don't give a shit what the AAUP says about adjunct academic freedom; unless a union is involved, there is no adjunct academic freedom. Period. It's a fiction that tenured professors like to tell at conferences.

--You have little or no recourse when someone with power over you decides he/she doesn't like you. Performance in the classroom has nothing to do with it. It's all about personality and politics.

--Students can torpedo your job with one complaint.

--The tenured faculty doesn't give a shit about you, although they may pretend to be sympathetic.

--Working hard is no guarantee you'll keep your job.
You are always overhead, the students profit. Overhead is expendable and replaceable, students are pure gold nuggets, no matter how they behave or perform in your classroom. If you are too hard, you'll lose your job; if you're too easy, you'll lose your job. And you're expected to know how to hit that middle ground, although the middle ground is forever shifting.

If you settle for adjuncting, no matter how much you love academe, you're a fool--I guarantee that you will come to hate the hypocrisy of "higher learning" within a few years, if not sooner.

I recommend that you flip burgers for a living. At least, when you go home, you're done for the day, and you might even get promoted.

But once an adjunct, always an adjunct whore.

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